Cranky Jennie ;-p

Today, while driving to pick up my children from school, I caught Glenn Beck discussing the 12 Values that America once stood for.  So, when I got home, I thought I’d look them up and expound about each one.

According to Beck, they are:

• Honesty
• Reverence
• Hope
• Thrift
• Humility
• Charity
• Sincerity
• Moderation
• Hard Work
• Courage
• Personal Responsibility
• Friendship

I did hear Mr. Beck say that being honest is not always an easy thing to do.  I have found that people lie so easily these days that it’s hard to decipher the truth.  Just look at the media.  Do I really need to get into how biased the media really is?  They treat is with kid gloves, under the assumption that we’re too stupid to figure things out on our own.  I value honesty in all its forms.  I reward honesty in my children, especially when they tell truth after doing something “bad”.  That takes courage.

Since I just mentioned courage, I will discuss each value out of order.  Courage, to me, is standing up for what you believe is right, even when everyone tells you that you’re wrong.  Courage is being victimized, but choosing NOT to be a victim.  Courage is our soldiers leaving their families while they fight for their country in a foreign land.  There are not many truly courageous people, as far as I am concerned.

Reverence is a lost art.  We revere the wrong people in this country: actors, musicians, athletes, even politicians.  Reverence should be reserved for our elders, for our true heroes and for those who do extraordinary things (scientists, doctors, charitable organizations, etc.).

Hope is a powerful value.  It can guide you through your darkest days and stand beside you when you feel alone.  Hope is a motivator to keep you moving.  However, hope alone is not enough.  I think you have to combine hope with action.  Together, they are lethal.

Humility is something I rarely see.  In a meeting over a year ago, a woman I worked with (who frequently pissed me off) wanted to bully a superior into doing what she wanted.  Irate, I told her off and took my anger too far.  That evening, I emailed everyone involved and apologized for my outburst.  I accepted what I did wrong and swallowed my pride.  The sad thing about the entire episode is that no one even bothered to acknowledge the apology.  So, is humility even worth it?  I think so, despite this experience.  It shows you’re human and you make mistakes.  Plus, you can still look yourself in the mirror the next day.

Hollywood has been dictating for years how we all need to be charitable.  I don’t have a problem with this, especially if you have the means to do so.  Charity does not mean simply donating money to a cause.  It also means cooking dinner for a sick neighbor or helping the old woman across the street.  It’s being kind to each other because you just feel like it and you don’t expect anything in return.  There are so many intrinsic rewards to being charitable.

Thrift and hard work go hand in hand when discussing today’s economy.  This country was founded upon hard work and determination.  It was based on working hard and saving your money so you could attain the American Dream.  The younger generations today seem to just expect to be paid for whatever work they do, regardless of lack of effort.  The economic crisis we’re in now is about people being rewarded for no reason and for getting what they want regardless of cost.  If there’s any lesson to be learned from this it’s that maybe you should step back, reevaluate and figure out what truly is important.

This brings me to moderation.  What’s that?  Good question, since this country has lost sight of it.  We’re so consumed by consumerism that we don’t value much.  Sure, the house looks nice when every light is on, but do you really need to use that much electricity?  I am far from a tree-hugging environmentalist, but there is some truth in taking care of our planet.  Anything that is abused eventually either dies or fights back, you know?

Which leads to Personal Responsibility.  The current government bailout supposedly rewards those who accept responsibility.  I haven’t read enough into yet to see if that’s true.  However, for those people who went out and bought over their heads, now is the time to pay the piper.

And while you’re paying the piper (or not, if you were smart and/or lucky), now is a good a time as any to look around and see who your true friends are.  Friendships stand a test whenever you are going through a difficult time in your life.  True friends stand by you, while “fair weather” friends disappear until everything is better.  My mother always told me that you’re truly blessed if you can count on your hand how many true friends you have.  Those true friends typically display the last value: sincerity.

What happened to people offering a sincere, “how are you”?  Sincerity goes along with kindness.  Do you mean what you say, and say what you mean?  Do you follow up those words with meaningful actions?  They mean so much more when you do…

I think I have them all covered.  I’d love to hear your ideas about this.

Maybe you don’t define these values the same way I do, but I do think Glenn Beck is on to something here.  It’s time to figure out who we are, what we stand for and where we are headed if we continue on this narcissistic path.

I love New Yorkers for so many reasons.  Of course, as a born and bred New Yorker, I may be slightly biased.  You have to admit that there’s no place quite like New York.

I am going to spend this post extolling my praises for as many generalizations as I can make about New Yorkers.  So, in the spirit of David Letterman, here are my Top 10 Reasons I LOVE NEW YORKERS!

1. New Yorkers are loud.  Of course we are!  We have to be heard over all the street noise, traffic, and other people!  Plus, what  we have to talk about is more important than what someone else has to talk about (especially in my house!).

2. New Yorkers are rude. We’re not rude.  We have somewhere to be.

3. Following along with number two, New Yorkers move quickly.  Why take your time?  Slow drivers, slow walkers, slow talkers drive me CRAZY!!!  Get  a move on!

4. New Yorkers tell it like it is.  I love, love, love this trait, especially considering recent events.  You don’t have to worry about people stabbing you in the back.  If she doesn’t like you, you KNOW she doesn’t like you.  I value that in a person!

5.  New Yorkers are proud of where they’re from.  Would any other collective group of people bond together like New Yorkers did after 9/11?  Those terrorists messed with the wrong people!

6. New Yorkers are tough.  I love the “don’t screw with me” attitude (I’m trying for a G rating here).  You just don’t push a New Yorker around.  If you are stupid enough to do so, he’s got a posse right around the corner ready to exact revenge. He may also give you a tongue-lashing for good measure.  I wouldn’t want to be the recipient of either!  God forbid you hurt one of us…we hold a grudge FOREVER.

7. New Yorkers are loyal.  We’re loyal to our friends, our families, our family’s friends, etc.  We will stand behind you and back you up whenever you need us.  We’ll even speak up for you whether it’s the popular thing to do or not.

8. New Yorkers are funny!  We have nicknames for every group of people and call each other by these names affectionately (sometimes).  We don’t believe in being Politically Correct.  Hallelujah!  It’s gotten ridiculous, don’t you think?  We can also tell a story unlike anyone else.  Said story may be peppered with a few (ok, a lot) F.U.s and the like.  Hey, it adds color to the story.

9.  New Yorkers will give you the sweater off their back.  We will help you out when you need it and not ask for anything in return.  Look at the firefighters or the cops.  They have each other’s backs whether it’s during work hours or not.

10. NY has the BEST food.  God, how I miss a greasy, thin slice of REAL NY pizza.  AND OH MY GOD, I miss when people can actually SAY the names of Italian foods.  It’s not MAN-i-COT-E.

I could continue writing this list for DAYS, but I think a top 10 list is the way to go.

So, now you’re asking, why did I move to AZ if I think New York rules?  I REALLY, REALLY like the sun.  I can’t help it.  An interesting thing to note, however, is that even out here I’ve gravitated towards New Yorkers as my friends.  See the above list as to why…

Some days, I just hate people.  Today is one of those days.

You know, I believe trouble comes in threes, so I’m just waiting for the next gem.

My morning started off hearing a story about someone I considered a friend (I really need to learn to reexamine who I consider friends).  So-called friend, now known as Backstabber #1, apparently talked crap about me to some stranger.  Thank you, so much.

I feel the need to point out a few things about myself.  I do not lie, cheat or steal.  My gender has been labeled manipulators.  So, I will accept that trait as one of my own, but I will defend myself by saying I manipulate openly.  There’s no sneakiness involved.  I am also honest to a faulty and extremely loyal.  So, I expect those traits in people I call “friends”.

I do not remain friends with people who are disloyal and/or selfish.  Childhood friend who turned out to be a narcissist?  Gone.  Friend who was dating my cousin and cheated on him?  Gone.  You get the idea.  I won’t even pretend to be cordial to Backstabber #1 the next time I see her.

On to Backstabbers 2, 3 and 4.

As you know, I coach sports teams for children.  For two seasons, I coached softball. I took this last season off because my eldest wanted to play basketball instead.  I told the parents that I would return to coaching softball in the spring.  I found out today, that three dads have chosen to coach in the spring too.  Now, that’s not the problem.  Who am I to begrudge a parent from coaching their own child.  The reason I am hurt is because they:  #1. Are trying to recruit the majority of my old team and, #2. They could have at least told me (out of respect) what they were doing.

I’ve gone over this last one a thousand times.  I came to the same conclusion: I would never have done something like that.  Maybe that’s the problem.  Maybe I hate people so frequently because my expectations are unrealistic.  Just because I choose not to be an ass doesn’t mean other people will make the same choice.

I’m learning (and I must be spastic b/c it’s taking me forever) that people are inherently selfish in that they will do whatever is best for themselves first, rather than what might be right.  Isn’t that ass backwards?

Maybe I’m missing the whole point.  Maybe the whole point is that you have to be kind, considerate and thoughtful only to a select few.  Maybe they’re the only ones who will truly appreciate it.  Maybe they’re the only ones who will return the favor.

That makes me sad

I love the concept of Pay it Forward.  You are kind to someone and then they’re kind to someone and so on.  Like Oprah says, what you put out there is what you get back.  HA!  Yeah, right.

&%$$# backstabbers!

* To improve the quality of my crappy day: someone took my reserved parking space, I slammed the car door on my hand, one of my dogs ate my daughter’s plant and left the dirt all over the carpet & my other dog caught a baby bunny.  And the bunny was still breathing when we found it…I couldn’t put it out of its misery…it eventually stopped breathing, so we buried it :(  BAD DOG!

I call her The Beast.

It is a well-deserved nickname.

Before I tell you who she is and why she earned that nickname, I want to first mention a few things.  I love children.  I really do.  I loved teaching them and I truly enjoy coaching them.  They are like blank slates -  innocent and eager to learn. I love to cheer them on when they do something well and I like to console them and offer them encouragement when they fail.

That said, let’s get to the focus of this post.  My daughters play in a recreational basketball league for girls in grades one to three.  I am one of their coaches.  You would be amazed at how competitive and aggressive the girls can get.  The point of a recreational league is to learn the fundamentals of the sport, display good sportsmanship, and have fun while playing on a team.  They learn how to work together and cheer each other on.

Enter The Beast.  The Beast is the biggest kid on the court - in height and in weight.  This is not the issue.  She could be the smallest and still earn the nickname.  The issue is how violently she plays.  She is a danger to every other child  on the court.  When grabbing a rebound, she twists violently with her elbows out.  The other kids, thankfully, stay away from her when she does this.  They have to!  Can you imagine the damage she could do?

At our game today, she and a girl on our team went down on the floor to get a ball.  The Beast KICKED our player in the back.  Where is the technical foul?  She should have been thrown out of the game.  The poor referees, who are volunteers and in this case, high school kids, were ill-equipped to deal with her.

I should mention that The Beast’s father is her coach and he cheers her on.  I have never witnessed anything like it.  The father is as guilty as the child.  Yes, The Beast is a child and she is a direct reflection of her father (I don’t know where the mother is).

Look, I believe you are born with a specific nature, but how you are nurtured can have a direct effect on how you function in society.  The Beast’s father obviously allows his daughter to bulldoze simple good sportsmanship.  He obviously doesn’t care if she gives another kid a concussion, a bloody nose or a black eye.  I care.

The Beast should play football.  At least the other kids have equipment on to protect them.  Witnessing the debacle yesterday was painful and pissed me off like I haven’t been in a long time.  I wrote an email to the league president asking him to do something about this situation.  If anything, The Beast should play in an upper level league with girls who are the same size.  I’m waiting to see if anything is done.

In the real world, what should happen (and yes, I know she’s a kid, but she’s just going to get worse as she gets older), is that someone is going to rightfully knock her on her ass.  When she went down at another point in the game, I turned to our other coach and said, “Well, she got what she deserved.”  It’s easy to forget she’s a kid when she acts like that.  I guess I should probably focus more on her father, since he’s the one who encourages this behavior.  Maybe he should be called The Beast instead.

Sometimes, waiting for the “what goes around comes around” takes too frigging long!